


Ephemeral

by mikasaster



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan Manga Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-23 10:40:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30054195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mikasaster/pseuds/mikasaster
Summary: Living peacefully in a place that very far from the hustle and bustle makes Mikasa gradually lose her power as an Ackerman. However, it worries Eren who doesn't have much time left. What if the time has come for him to leave her alone?
Relationships: Mikasa Ackerman/Eren Yeager
Comments: 2
Kudos: 39





	Ephemeral

**Author's Note:**

> Just another scenario of Eremika cottagecore AU but make it Mikasa loses her Ackerman power.

She had never felt this way before. She can do all the household chores with ease as usual, but it also makes her tired easily. Today, she has rested three times just by chopping woods, an activity she uses to and often does. Mikasa rubs the sweat that flowing from her forehead with the back of her hand before sitting on the grass while massaging her left shoulder. She catches her breath, letting the wind blow her body gently.

"You aren't like usual," says Eren who comes out of their hut before sitting next to Mikasa. He hands her a glass of water and Mikasa grabs it quickly. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Mikasa replies after sipping the drink until not a single drop is left. "I just need to get used to the atmosphere here."

"We've been here for two months," Eren says quietly. He takes out the floral-embroidered handkerchief that Mikasa had made a while ago from his pocket and gives it to her. Mikasa refuses by shaking her head.

"You can use it for yourself," she says with a thin smile on her face.

"I'm not done with my work yet."

"So do I."

"Mikasa," That soft voice yet full of emphasis makes Mikasa closes her mouth immediately. She blinks, looking at Eren in perplexity. He cuts the distance between them before raising his hand, rubbing her sweaty face with the handkerchief softly. "Let me finish everything."

"Are you sure?"

He gives her a single nod before standing up, getting ready to continue his work. "We still have some groceries for two days. We can spend some time resting tomorrow."

Mikasa doesn't answer, she smiles as she watches Eren swing the ax and cut the woods they had gotten from the forest earlier. Neither one of them is talking, only the constant sound of the ax Eren uses, the sound of the birds chirping, and the sound of leaves rubbing against each other in the wind.

Once upon a time, Mikasa always dreamed of having a life like this. Quiet live somewhere, only the two of them. Until they have agreed to leave everything behind and start a new one. But....

_Is this the right decision?_

Every single day, that kind of question is haunting her. Sometimes, she just needs to look at Eren who does his daily normal activities, and Mikasa will shake her head vigorously. She doesn't even want to imagine how Eren would be if they don't decide to run away like this.

Sometimes, she thinks that this is the best choice.

At least, this is the best for Eren.

\----

The next day, Mikasa knits a sweater, sitting across from Eren who read a book they had bought in the town. She notices that Eren tucks in his hair that falls past his forehead behind his ear every now and then. Mikasa smiles knowing that this is the first time Eren has long hair, she wonders if he feels comfortable with that.

"Eren, tell me if you feel uncomfortable with your hair. You know, I can cut it off for you." She puts the knit on the table when Eren lifts his head from the book, raises his eyebrows. But quickly, he smiles and folds the small edge of the page as a mark before closing it.

"Sure."

Mikasa gets up from her seat before holding a small knife, scissors, and a comb. She walks around to Eren's back, she grabs the sides of the chair, trying to pull it back a little. Mikasa confuses when the chair doesn't move at all. This is usually one of the easiest things she can do. Mikasa tries one more time and still the same. She can't do it.

Realizing what Mikasa is trying to do, Eren takes the initiative to stand up and pushes the wooden chair back. Mikasa's speechless and just looking at him with mouth agape. Eren seems to understand Mikasa's confusion just give a tap on her shoulder before sitting back down and turning his head to her with a smile on his face.

Forgetting her confusion for a moment, Mikasa combs Eren's hair slowly. She makes sure to tidy it up first before cutting it for good results. As her hands nimbly start cutting his hair, Mikasa doesn't stop humming a song that she used to sing with his father when she was a kid. This also makes Mikasa realize that Eren becomes more relaxed. And she can't help but laugh at the fact that his shoulders had stiffened once Mikasa started to play her scissors over his head.

"Huh?" Mikasa pulls her hands away from Eren's hair immediately when he suddenly turns his head quickly, staring at her in shock. "Did I hurt you?!"

He blinks for a moment before shaking his head. "You just laughed."

"Oh," she responds, still doesn't understand what he means. "...And?"

"You, uh, I've never seen or even heard it."

Come to think of it, Mikasa rarely laughs, at least not in front of people. Even if there is something that seems fun, she just smiles. For some reason, it feels like everything is getting lighter. She is an expressive person, yet now she finds it easier to express happiness. As if there is no longer a big burden on her chest.

Mikasa resumes her activities and neither of the two makes the slightest sound. When it's done, Eren stands up quickly and sees his new appearance through a small mirror that hangs in his room. His smile is big, Mikasa stares adoringly at him and feels her heart beat faster.

Unexpectedly, Eren runs and gives her a gentle hug, murmuring thanks on top of her head. Mikasa holds him even tighter and buries her face on his neck. It's just another awkward moment between them, as time goes by, they feel the small things like this are very natural. It may indeed be necessary for the two of them to show affection for each other. In odd moments, they would automatically hold hands as they descended the hill, or, it's just Eren giving her a forehead kiss before sleep. And Mikasa's favorite is when she scratches Eren's scalp to calm him down.

Mikasa knows that they are getting more and more comfortable with each other's company. Even though they have been together for a long time, this time is certainly different. Because there are only the two of them. The awkward atmosphere that had always restricted their movements finally disappears for a bit and brings them closer.

\----

Mikasa wakes up in the middle of the night when she feels her throat tightens. She takes a glass and fills it with water from the teapot, bringing it to a wooden bench under the window. She finishes her drink while watching the moon shining above. She sighs, suddenly thinking about how her strength seems to disappear slowly.

She is fully aware that the strength she had always have is because of Ackerman's blood that flows in her body.

She turns her head and stares at the closed-door of Eren's room. Honestly, she is afraid. She is afraid that she can't protect him without that power. She knows that she doesn't want to and will never allow something bad to happen to him. Losing the strength as an Ackerman doesn't necessarily make her weak. After all, she was a former trained soldier. She can protect him with her strength.

Mikasa still doesn't take her eyes off when Eren opens his door slowly. He comes out, rubbing his eyes and yawning widely. He walks over to her before sitting beside her.

"What's wrong?" he asks, leaning his head to the back of the bench with eyes that seem too heavy to open.

"Nothing. I'm just thirsty."

"Why don't you go back to sleep? Is there anything you are thinking about?"

"Hm," Mikasa mutters before leaning her head on his shoulder. "I'm just curious, how could I lose my strength, you know. It feels like I'm not handling the 'Ackerman' power anymore."

"What do you mean?"

"Eren, you noticed it too, right? I'm not as strong as before. "

Eren opens his eyes as he turned to Mikasa. "What are you even talking about? You hit my back yesterday, even leaving a red mark!"

"It's because you surprised me!"

"You were also chopping more woods than me! Carrying them on your back!"

"That's—,"

"The number of laps you run in a certain time is still far more than mine. You still always beat me in many ways. Mikasa, tell me, what power do you say has disappeared?"

Mikasa sighs quietly. Hearing his desperate voice makes Mikasa feels uncomfortable, remembering that Eren used to feel jealous because she was stronger than him back on their training days.

"Don't worry about it. For me, you're still the same as before," Eren brings Mikasa's hand into his as if he tries to convince her that everything is going to be alright. He uses his other hand to caress the side of her face gently, playing his thumb above the scar under her right eye. They are staring into each other's eyes, conveying some unspoken words between the two of them.

"Come on, we have to get up early," Eren smiles before getting up from his seat. His hand slowly lets go of hers and makes Mikasa feel kind of disappointed. But quickly, Mikasa grabs Eren's arm, holding him back. Eren tilts his head, looking at Mikasa in confusion.

"Can I sleep with you?"

\----

She doesn't know since when Eren has closed his eyes with his back resting on the tree behind him. His head bows, his mouth opens slightly. Mikasa who has her head on his lap, touches his face lightly, playing her fingertips from his jaw to his cheekbone, slowly down to his lips.

She does the same movement over and over, mumbling a song that Eren always likes to hear. But it doesn't last long when Eren suddenly opens his eyes, grabbing Mikasa's wrist tightly. "What's wrong?" Mikasa asks as she gets up from her sleep. "Did you remember something?"

His face is full of sweat as he tries to catch his breath. Mikasa doesn't have time to say anything when Eren suddenly hugs her tightly. She wraps her arms around his body, rubbing his back slowly.

"Mikasa, can you promise me one thing?"

 _Promise?_ She sighs, knowing that this conversation will never end well between them. They had promised each other not to talk about this anymore. Mikasa falls silent, waiting for Eren to continue his words.

"I don't have much time left, I'm gonna leave you here alone. Sorry. Sorry for being selfish and bring you to this place. You will live a long life without me." his voice almost sounds like a whisper yet it still manages to penetrate deep into her soul as if it wants to tear apart the fortress she had created all this time. It hurts. "Please, keep on living and forget about me."

Mikasa doesn't even react to his words anymore. It hurts. She can't give a single answer. However, no matter how hard Eren asks, Mikasa will never be able to forget him. How could she forget someone who had led her out of the darkness? How could she forget someone she loves for more than half of her life?

Love? Since when does Mikasa convince herself that the feeling she has for him is love? Does she understand its meaning?

She doesn't know.

"Yes," is all that Mikasa can give to him as her answer. "I promise."

She breaks away from him, looking at his face closely. "Eren, is there anything you are worried about?"

On the other hand, Eren is reluctant to express his worries. It's a big lie if he isn't worried about Mikasa at all, especially after she loses her strength as an Ackerman. He doesn't have much time, he doesn't know, maybe tomorrow, in the next hour, or even in the next second, he might not be breathing anymore anytime. He is going to leave her here. What is the guarantee that she is going to be fine after he's gone?

"I'll be fine, I promise. Don't worry"

Her voice is so calm, he understands very well that it's a sign that she is not okay. _At all._ Eren hasn't answered anything yet when Mikasa pulls his head closer, kissing his forehead. He closes his eyes, enjoying every remaining moment when they still holding each other like this.

"Please, don't worry about me, okay?"

Eren nods before pulling himself away from Mikasa. He wraps his arms around Mikasa's waist before kissing her lips gently. Eren feels the shock from Mikasa's reaction, but it doesn't matter when Mikasa returns the kiss with the same favor. This is a new thing for them, the kiss is less innocent than another kiss they had done, it makes them feel even more warmth. His fingers tangling in her hair, tugging at her neck to deepen their kiss. Mikasa's hand slips beneath his shirt and he can feel that her hand is cold. _Too cold_. His eyes widen as those tiny fingers start moving and draw abstract patterns on his abdomen. Eren pulls away, grasping Mikasa's hand from his shirt as he realizes what he has done. He mutters sorry multiple times, placing his forehead on hers.

"Sorry, we shouldn't have done that."

"Why?"

 _Because I will_ _only hurt you more, leaving scars on you as if the one on your face wasn't enough._ He swallows his words, choosing to shake his head without giving her an answer.

"Eren, don't worry about something that hasn't happened yet. I am fine." She smiles, trying to reassure him. Her palms that are still cold from the nervousness due to their previous activities grips his hand tightly, bringing his knuckles and gives them a long kiss. "As long as we are together for the rest of our time, I'll be fine."

**Author's Note:**

> Mikasa is still stronger than Eren lol, but her strength is normal in this AU :)
> 
> Canon? Canon.


End file.
